Aww a 29-year old reader who is a female banker has deemed
it fit to reply ‘the rich Lagos bachelor’ who highlighted the Daily Pains Of A
Single Rich Guy In Lagos. According to her, she is also in a similar situation
because she is rich and it has been hard finding the right guy. She highlighted
all the points of the bachelor and replied right below each phrase.
1. Many girls
automatically assume that you are a player – Drive a nice car, wear good
clothes, smell well and live in a comfortable house and many gals automatically
tag you out as a player. undecided I have been told so many times by girls. One
of my close friend had to quit a relationship because his girlfriend was just
too insecure and didn’t trust him. sad My ex-gfs have also accused me of
cheating even though I was never caught.
Response: This is
unfortunate but its because most good girls are afraid they will get hurt. i
love a man that takes care of himself and pays attention to details but Hollywood
and social media has shown that once a guy looks good and drives nice cars, he
a player. However I have hope that I will meet the strong, kind, ambitious and
gentle man. Continue...
2. Many think you have a girlfriend – You walk up to a girl,
chat her up and start off a conversation. You become her friend and eventually
ask her out. She tells you to your face that she knows that you already have a
girlfriend, and possibly a fiancée. She tells you that it is virtually
impossible for you to be single with your current status. For goodness sake,
what does my financial status has to do with my relationship life. I tire o. From
that point onward, they hardly take you serious.
Response: This occurs because you meet a lot of fake ladies who have
no self-confidence. They believe that since you are rich, you can only date or
marry a rich lady and so you have come for just a fling.
3. Some girls are
just interested in your money – Yes, many rich guys can testify to this. You
meet lots and lots of female fraudster – we call them runs girls. angry They
pretend to like you but all they are interested in is to get a share of your
‘national cake’ – your money. I can not count the number of times that girls
(that I am still toasting) will be asking me to pay for their house rent, set
up a business for them, etc when I am yet to start dating them. Even at the
stage of friendship, some start asking for phones, Brazilian hairs and all
kinds of stuffs. It’s annoying! Why is it so hard sometimes to meet a decent,
good looking girl? I must confess not all girls are like that but many are.
Response: All I can say is, you have been meeting the wrong kind of
women. It’s unfortunate but know that there are great ladies out there who want
someone to love and care about. Women who can take care of themselves and all
they desire is someone to share their heart with and support each other.
4. You spend more for your girlfriends – Girlfriends who
have rich boyfriends expect their guys to spend more for them. You will find
out that your broke male friends spend far less for their girlfriends ( and the
girls appear to be contented), but in your case, your girlfriends expect that
you ‘prove’ your love by spending your cash on them. If you don’t spend
lavishly, you risk being tagged as ‘stingy’ cry
Response: This still boils down to the fact that you meet and date
selfish ladies who want your money and love you for that only. Please note that
Love is not self –seeking it is reciprocal, both parties much care for one
another and it is the little things that matter.
5. Fine girls tend to play more ‘hard-to-get’ with the rich
guys than the broke ones – YES! You heard me right. It’s surprisingly ironic,
isn’t it? Fine girls tend to play hard to get with the rich guys because they
want to been seen as decent and not after money. Many atimes, it’s just sheer
pretence. Embarrassed. They pretend to be decent, good, domesticated. They may
sometimes hide their promiscuous and cheap lifestyle because they assume that
they have finally met the serious-minded rich guy. So, they want to appear like
a good girl. Some may also play hard-to-get so that you can spend more during
the toasting stage. Meanwhile, you find out that these girls keep rolling
carelessly and freely with the not-so-rich guys in the neighborhood.
Response: As for this one, I do not have a response to this. All I
know is there are serious minded ladies who are self-confidence and do not need
to front, they speak their mind and have no reason to pretend.
6. You become paranoid. You find it hard to know who really
loves you. You also tend to think the girls in your circle are only around
because of your money. You become confused and it gets difficult to settle for
a choice. It seems best to have settled for someone before you ‘made’ it.
Embarrassed.
Response: I agree with you comfortable bachelor on this , because even
as a lady I have become paranoid about guys because I believe all they see is
the physical and because they feel I am ambitious, they see a cash cow to milk.
7. You may actually meet fewer number of good girls – You
heard me right. You find out that you meet mostly bad and extremely extroverted
girls. This is because the richer you get, the more isolated you may become.
You drive your car, meaning that you do not meet ladies often in the bus or
park. You do mostly online transfer meaning that you also miss out on ladies
who visit the banks. You also are too busy to visit near-by higher insitutions
where you can meet various chicks. We often live in very secured estates where
everybody minds his/her own business further isolating us from meeting the
real, ‘good’ gals out there. We tend to hang out in bars and clubs where you
meet the highly extroverted, possibly bad gals. Gals in church are possibly
worse-off too and not much better. Sigh…. cry
Response: I totally agree with you comfortable bachelor, I have been
looking out for good guys but haven’t met any. I spend my weekends at home,
sleeping or watching TV. I decided to start an MBA to keep myself occupied and
am planning on doing other courses. It is crazy, churches are filled with pretentious human
beings. An advice I hear always is to change my routine, change my
church if I have to, change the place I hang out and meet new people. This is
hard to do but you can give it a try also…..
8. You spend more than others to get a gal others would
easily get with little cash – Another sad truth. Standards are set for you.
While the not-so-rich guys will think twice before spending even less than 5k
on a girl, you find yourself spending comparatively more for a gal. Due to your
class, you have minimum standards for yourself, and you find it hard to go
below it as it has become part of your lifestyle. First impression matters a
lot for women. When you take a lady on a date within your ‘minimum standard
‘which may be very ordinary to you, she may become carried away with the
lavishness. She often steps up her game so as not to appear cheap. cool
Response: This is because you chose to, you always want to impress the
lady, even though it is good to have class and taste but you overdo it thus she
starts to demand and then you start to complain. Keep it cool, do the little
things like appreciate her, praise her, thank her, listen to her, gist with her
…..These are the things that make a lady happy.
9. Your true personality is often buried beneath your
financial strength sad – Rich guys are one of the most misunderstood persons.
Sometimes, we just want to be ourselves. However, friends and hanger-bys tend
to be insecure and intimidated around us and think of us only in terms of our
money. You jokingly tease a girl, and she is quick to point out to you that ‘is
it because you think you have money?’ Not only girls, even fellow friends
around you will feel very insecure. Some do not want to introduce you to their
girlfriends because they are afraid that you will snatch them away. You find
street guys freely talking to these fine young girls, and nobody calls them
names. If you do same, people tag you as arrogant, player, disrespectful, etc.
All focus is on you. Gossips are directed towards you…hmm angry
Response: Comfortable bachelor, you do not have to take this kind of
things to heart. Do not lower your standards for anyone, be your good self as
long as money doesn’t define your behavior then forget what people say as in
life, gossip is what keeps everyone going. Be the wonderful person I hope you
are and someday when you are not even looking for, the lady will come along.
10. You find out the real, hard truth that money cannot buy
true love. Of course, money plays a very big role as it can fuel and sustain
true love but money can hardly get you true love. Money can get you a beautiful
woman, but it can’t get you a decent, faithful and loyal girl. Ever rich,
comfortable or even upcoming guy out there should focus more on building a
personality that is attractive to ladies. I have been poor and loved by a lady
unconditionally before. I am comfortable and have been hurt by a lady recently.
I have been both poor and rich in my life. From my experience, I can very well
say that LIKEABLE PERSONALITY COMES BEFORE MONEY.
Response: I'm glad you realized this truth. For that reason it means
you have become a better person and I know the bone of your bone will come
along.
I will leave you, Comfortable Bachelor with this text: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not
envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is
not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices
with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always
perseveres (1 Corinthians 13: 4-7).
I will like to meet you someday if possible.
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